Local Quotes

Or Stupid things people I know (or don't know) have said

"Goddess damn it, kristin! How many times do I have to tell you to lay off the fucking e-pheromones!" -- Jeff X. Mink (on my latest road of odd net email,etc)

*Mal2* it's my observation that when kristin likes an author enough to start sending you books, it's an author worth reading <Tue Dec 16 23:27> (Brian Swetland about me and a book by James Morrow

" I was raised Catholic, so repression is instinctive." - Dan Simms

""Nerd" has worse connotations; a "geek" is a weird techie/hacker/scifi- fan-type person or similar; a "nerd" however is the stereotypical, well, nerd; it's the trailing-edge of the geek continuum, just before "dork". Nerds typically have no social skills and no life and confine their interests to something like train spotting or collecting obscure objects."
-- Andrew C Bulhak, Geek of Computer Science

"If I were a female, I'd date Will." -- Alan Braverman
"If I was a female, I *wouldn't* date Will. A programmer has to have standards, ya know?" -- Brian Swetland

<Lone-Wolf> hey linky, you teach me how to be a netnews snide comment king, and i'll teach you how to piss someone off to the point of pulling out the modem cord on irc :)

Computer science has the unfortunate characteristic that many of the pioneers in the field are still alive and doing research. -- Adam Rifkin

Don't consider sarcasm the be all and end all of verbal intercourse. Far too many people place way too much importance on the sarcasm instead of the talking in and of itself as a precious shared experience between people. -- Adam Rifkin

Lyrics are the deep thoughts of our generation. -- Adam Rifkin

"Unclassified Use Only. Do not place this item within six inches of classified computer, communications componenets or transmission lines." -- on LLNL computer

you know, for someone with lots of skating injuries, you sure have bad taste in video games :) :) :) -- Pete Zurich

"This is not directed as an insult (especially not to Random, who knows me and could very easily find out where I live), but it is not wise to judge a person by their home page photograph." -- Jeff Mink

Unix really gives me a woody. -- Erik Pennebaker

<Teela> it really stands for escape-meta-alt-control-shift
<Riker69> Real men (and women) use vi.
<cvk> eventually mallocs all computer storage
<Teela> oh no, I'm not gonna be dragged into this...I'm bi-editoral

"Congratulations Kristin, you attract net.losers." -- Joe Gross

"kristin. you dont just attract net.losers. you attract real-life.losers too..."--Brian Swetland

"We're getting Kaplan's router?" -- Alex Parga
"Wessel will spooge" -- Joe Gross

"Q: Can sarcasm travel electronically?
A: Case in Point: Jason Lindquist" -- Dave Morgan

"..besides, that's rude. I'm not in a particularly rude mood today" -- Brian Swetland
"Where's Lindquist?" -- Jay Kreibich

"the day I have an .ircrc is the day I'll know its too late." -- Brian Swetland

"Who needs women when you have 'puters" -- Joe Gross

"Ummm, there's only so much you can do with a computer..." -- Ian Cardenas

"If I were God I'd have a NeXT" -- Ian Cardenas

"Anyone not out of the lab in 5 minutes owes me a safe word" --Laura Bunting "I think I've found a new girlfriend" -- Erik Pennebaker, while hugging the monitor to a PowerPC

"What do you mean doom changes your personality?
-Ian, you mean I'm not a blood thirsty psycho, wanting only to see his friends
fall to their knees in front of him, clutching for breath as I unload one
final burst from my shotgun, ending the pathetic charade they call life?"

"How do I make it vibrate?" -- Erik Pennebaker

"Its kinda funny watching the new NeXT admin attempting to hook up a TV, a VCR, and a sega. Kinda funny to see him repeatedly fry the TV....." --Erik Pennebaker about Ian Cardenas

"I have found not to try to interpret their explanations because they make little sense most of the time. Instead, I enjoy the show for the more subtle, other things they are trying to say.
Secondly, I came to a realization during the episode: Patrick Stewart is, indeed, quite sexy. I feel so ashamed that I did not realize this before. Finally, about the finale: "...it was...*very* stimulating"" --Tom Dobrowolsky

"I feel like going out and getting drunk. I can't get over all of these people who are shocked that college-aged women "drink to get drunk"... well of course.. why else would they drink? To throw away their extra cash? To put on a few more unsightly pounds?" --Dave Lemson

Oozing pale jelly,
the SPAM lays there quietly,
thinking to itself.
--Matt Hucke

"Women with hairy armpits shouldn't be allowed to wear those sundresses with the stringy shoulder straps." -- Mitri Vanichtheeranont

"Actually, Mad passionate sex has no abbreviation, for... abbreviated sex would most surely not be mad nor passionate, although brief sex *COULD* be mad and passionate or both." -- Mitri Vanichtheeranont

"i'm only talking about meaningful couch relationships, not just casual couching.
-Joe [Gross], who would never sleep on a couch he didn't love"

"The secret to loser longevity is not to spam but to slowly ooze like the spam gelatin packaging." -- Ian Cardenas

"My hard drive is named Jennifer, not because it goes down but because it crashes all the time. It's also slow and bitchy" -- Jeff Absher

"I refuse to use any cheesy mail program named after a tree" -- Jason Hoos

"Guys, I've got rice in my underwear" -- Jason Weiss

"There was a certain amount of mathematics involved" -- Professor Simmons on presenting Schroedinger's Equation.

"It's traditional to make physics students suffer a bit" -- Professor Simmons

"It's something utterly useless to waste cputime" -- me, referring to ico
"Oh, kinda like emacs?" -- Alex Parga

"If you were God... Why would you be using emacs? I'd be playing doom..." -- Erik Pennebaker

"I'd be willing to forego romance just to piss off Hoos" -- Jason Lindquist

"I expected it once I knew it was coming." -- Jason Weiss

"These days, of course, we all know DOS is a programming language." -- Professor Zbrodoff, department of Psychology

"Sorry, I don't get excited by bubbles." -- Joe Gross

"We were talking about, well ok I was talking about..." -- Mark Roth

"I am religious. If you think the previous sentence says that I am a Christian, hit yourself over the head with a blunt object four thousand seven hundred and eleven times." -- Calle Dybedahl

"Libor, Atheist, Anarchist, Research Programmer" -- Libor on uiuc.test

"You need to rotate your plant" -- Ken Rustin

"Champaign was started by a bunch of Chicagoans who said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime, poverty, and cold, but there's just so much to do here.'" -- Adam Rifkin

"In 3-space, distance from a person is measured in terms of physical space. In e-space, it is measured by difference between your reality and that person's." -- acb

"I wonder what they're using for their server" -- Jay Kreibich, while looking at the Playboy Server

#!/usr/local/bin/dwim       | "Why do we have to hide from the police, Daddy?"
# Dave Fischer dave@cca.org | "Because we use vi, son. They use emacs."

 [kristin buxton]  [quotes